Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Steampunk or Hipster?

Steampunks and Hipsters both share an affinity for vintage clothing, obscure music and epic facial hair. I realize that many laypeople may find the distinction between the two subcultures somewhat muddied, and have prepared a brief, scientific quiz to help differentiate the two. Simply pose the following questions to your subject.

Steampunk or Hipster: The Quiz

1. You wear your muttonchops
a) Ironically
b) Sincerely

2. Your air of smug superiority is
a) a natural manifestation of my superior taste
b) something I affect in order to live up to my top hat

3. Bicycle that doesn't coast?
a) fixie
b) penny-farthing

4. What are you drinking?
a) PBR
b) Earl Grey

5. why won't I hear your favorite song on the radio?
a) the artist who wrote it has never recorded it and only plays locally
b) the artist who wrote it died in 1896

6. best thrift store find?
a) vintage denim
b) vintage tweed

7. don't you think your outfit looks a bit silly?
a) you wouldn't understand
b) why, is my cravat askew?

8. bow ties?
a) cool
b) cool

Add up the total number of "a" or "b" answers.
Mostly "a"s indicated that the subject is a member of the Hipster culture.
Mostly "b"s indicates that the subject is a member of the Steampunk culture
An even mix of "a" and "b" answers indicates that the person before you is an unholy mix of Hipster and Steampunk, and may be somewhat dangerous. Run.

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